Another Convo with Scottydg
I'm sure you got a chuckle out of the last conversation I had with Scott I know I did this time it really got out of hand. Pull up a chair and some coffee cause this was a bit longer than the last one.
Java style comments as usual of course. And appreciate the colors I had to go and color the names all by hand so screw you guys lets get started!
ScottyDg842: [ Zone Labs Security alert: Session not encrypted because scottydg842 is not protected by IM Security ]
//For the love of God will Zone alarm not go away!!! Please note he initiates this time. Whatever //does he wants?
ScottyDg842: sup?
Lightningcount48: nm? I'm just playin my Browser game and getting spammed
Lightningcount48: u?
ScottyDg842: last minute packing
Lightningcount48: fun
//so its confirmed the British are coming and here I thought he just wanted some small talk
//the following should be considered build up it took me a little while to work up to messing with //him
ScottyDg842: man, I spent like an hour trying to figure out how to move my stash
Lightningcount48: like place in bag and carry?
Lightningcount48: you're not flying are you?
ScottyDg842: this stuff smells really stong
ScottyDg842: no, car ride
ScottyDg842: ended up in foil, in steel box filled with laundry shit and frebreeze
Lightningcount48: plastic bag duct tape wrapping paper and an air freshener
//I still think my idea was better
Lightningcount48: or that
ScottyDg842: the problem is, its 7 grams
Lightningcount48: weed or coke?
ScottyDg842: weed
ScottyDg842: never done coke
//Had to check
Lightningcount48: don't its worse than pulp fiction makes it out to be
ScottyDg842: I'm getting some shrooms when we go back to school
Lightningcount48: explain to me the "shrooms" does one grow them in the woods on dead logs or....is that something else
//I know what shrooms are please! Let the games begin
ScottyDg842: the ones I am getting are from friends basement
ScottyDg842: why?
Lightningcount48: I'm totally certain what a "shroom" is
ScottyDg842: a type of mushroom, generally containing one of 3 chemicals that are non toxic in humans
//so our druggie is also a chemist whoopdie doo
Lightningcount48: so it is the dead fingus stuff still but it gets you high
ScottyDg842: yes
ScottyDg842: best if eaten, but they taste fucking nasty
Lightningcount48: what about cooking them
ScottyDg842: can destory chemical, I'm going to cut them up and put in somthing
Lightningcount48: turbos?
ScottyDg842: dunno what I am going to get yet, havent decided (my dealer for everything is a friend in school)
//I don't care who your dealer is what are you trying to prove?
Lightningcount48: sounds fun
Lightningcount48: So you're coming up tomorrow?
ScottyDg842: yea
//SHIT!!! I need an alibi quick.
Lightningcount48: why are you bringing your stash
Lightningcount48: No one here that you hung out with smokes weed
ScottyDg842: tommy
ScottyDg842: mikey
ScottyDg842: and formyself
Lightningcount48: I didn't think tom and mike smoked weed.
//a revelation to me and I live here, but on the other hand I wouldn't be surprised
scottydg842: [ Zone Labs Security alert: Session not encrypted because scottydg842 is not protected by IM Security ]
ScottyDg842: omg
ScottyDg842: dude, tommy smokes a lot
Lightningcount48: really?
//Does he have any idea what would happen to Tommy if he was caught smoking weed? //Imagine your worst nightmare times 10. That's Tommy's dad getting pissed off.
ScottyDg842: yea
ScottyDg842: travis quit when he got his current female
//There's that female again Now I'm messin fo' sho' How does He know Travis has a "female"?
//unless... yes Travis is Fucking with him I'm pretty sure. Travis never smoked weed.
ScottyDg842: and I would bet barr does
Lightningcount48: wow
//there's no way in hell Barr was speaking fluent coherent English last I saw him, unless he just
//smoked down an entire laundry basket full in the past day and IMed Scott....
ScottyDg842: you..didn't notice all the signs?
ScottyDg842: man, I knew they were smoking a long time ago
// a day ago? How come I couldn't tell? O please enlighten me o High one
Lightningcount48: what are the signs? I'm pretty caught up in school so I don't hang out so much
ScottyDg842: lack of a sense of time if they are high, copious food comsumption, and in the case of tommy, if he is really philisophical
//Tom has always been philosophical and able to consume massive amounts of food...unless he's
//been smoking weed since the first grade! I was obviously shocked.
ScottyDg842: I ate a pound of laffy taffy once, a fucking pound
//Have fun with that one
Lightningcount48: I've noticed that but it makes sense and in all respects Tom has always consumed a ton of food
ScottyDg842: also, if they seem really out of it
Lightningcount48: Well Tom never comes to school anyway
//which is true
ScottyDg842: Monday I couldn't focus on shit due to the amount I had smoked on sunday
//Scott probably had to scroll up about here to get back on topic he was a bit lost as you can see
Lightningcount48: Barr? I dunno he's pretty with it
ScottyDg842: I dunno if barr does or doesnt
ScottyDg842: mikey and tommy I am sure about
Lightningcount48: I don't talk to mikey much anymore
Lightningcount48: you said Dagaro smoked it too?
ScottyDg842: yea, he stopped once he started dating his current women
//all of a sudden there is plural case and I am confused. Where did this herum come from and
//how didn't I know?
ScottyDg842: he and I were talking about it one night
Lightningcount48: how many women did he say he had?
ScottyDg842: 1
Lightningcount48: that's a woman my friend
Lightningcount48: just one
ScottyDg842: dude, you have no idea how messed up my brain is, it is amazing I am coherent
ScottyDg842: they guys at karate thought I was high
Lightningcount48: weren't you?
ScottyDg842: no, I used most of my spare stuff last weekend, saving current stuff for pa and alice
//The correct answer is yes I'm sorry you get kicked squarely in the empty space where your
//nuts used to be.
ScottyDg842: plus I dont get stoned when I need to drive
Lightningcount48: good idea
ScottyDg842: after karate I went and played pool at a bar with one of the other guys, it was so weird being the only white guy with the only black guy in a bar filled with hispanics all speaking spanish
Lightningcount48: fun place
Lightningcount48: you know you're coming back to a monochromatic town right? So don't wig out or anything
//I was hoping to have a subtle rascist demeanor as you will see, The mind fuck is in full swing
ScottyDg842: yea, I've fucking changed so much down here
ScottyDg842: also, turns out if I straighten my hair, it is easy to make myself look like a chick
ScottyDg842: alice was curious one day
//please stop talking to me. I already knew you were a girl and you confirmed your girl is a //lesbian
Lightningcount48: yeah don't do that
ScottyDg842: voice and height give it away though
Lightningcount48: we have more gay people in our school than black people
Lightningcount48: 3 gays
Lightningcount48: 2 black
Lightningcount48: maybe 3
//Statistics on the fly I could be in the Census Bearoh (sp w/e)
ScottyDg842: I am friends with one gay guy here, know 2 others
//I'll bet you are
ScottyDg842: damn, I am friends with 5 black guys
ScottyDg842: hell, the one and I are so rasict when we get together
//Interestingly unimportant thank you. Below you will see a blatant lie that any normal person
//would have called me on, except Scott who at this point will believe anything
Lightningcount48: Scott I'm afraid my female might like her some dark chocolate. Her name is Sam and she goes to Altoona with a buncha naggers and I don
Lightningcount48: t
Lightningcount48: want her riding the dark pole youy know?
Lightningcount48: How do you keep your femal in line
//Yeah those naggers you know, I'm not sure if he ever picked up on that. I thought I would //adopt the term "female" for fun. I can't believe he bought this
ScottyDg842: I really don't, my female is attracted to both guys and girls
Lightningcount48: I think she's been looking at a black man though and when push comes to shove its about the size and I'm sure he's got me beat and he's only like 15, but he's got a nagger cock you know?
//he is black after all
ScottyDg842: well, if she cares about you, she will stay with you
Lightningcount48: See its not about the caring really its about the pounding and the grinding and I just don't think I'm givin it to her would weed make me better in bed you think?
ScottyDg842: weed..doesnt really help with that sort of thing as far as I can tell
Lightningcount48: o maybe alcohol then
//Alcohol and other depressants increase longevity if you aren't too depressed to get an erection
ScottyDg842: I am lucky in that my tounge is longer then most..and I know how to do things with it
//O boy here we go. I really didn't need to know,but once he said this I couldn't stop
Lightningcount48: what kind of things like, Lick her ear? Muh hoe loves that
//All of a sudden I have the experience of a 12 year old
ScottyDg842: ummm....how far have you gone with her?
Lightningcount48: she says we've gone all the way
ScottyDg842: k, you know how to use your tounge down...lower
Lightningcount48: sure I guess....
ScottyDg842: thats like, most girls favorite thing
//What is this plural case where does it come from!!!???
Lightningcount48: how many girls have you done it too?
ScottyDg842: just alice
//He's not on the ball tonight at all. Its a good thing we know who she is so we can stop the //proliferation of Scott
ScottyDg842: you need to learn her body, and what she does
Lightningcount48: she just says stop and that I did a good job? Is she lying to me? I think she might be bangin the black dude
ScottyDg842: ummm...I wouldn't overstress about her cheating, cuz you will get paranoid and obessesive
Lightningcount48: k...should I ask her?
ScottyDg842: you may not want to ask her flat out, as that will probably just end up pissing her off
Lightningcount48: what if I touched her differenty...what if I used something to pleasure her...like my Playstation Controller or something?
//That's the quickest most rediculous thing I could think of that he might believe. surprisingly //he bought it
ScottyDg842: dude, no, trying shit like that is way to dangerous unless she is giving hints about stuff like that
Lightningcount48: why? Have you tried that before with your female?
ScottyDg842: I mean dangerous as in angering her
Lightningcount48: o
ScottyDg842: first off, you do know where her clit is right?
Lightningcount48: ...yeah I've seen pictures on Wikipedia so I have a good idea
//And yet he continues...
ScottyDg842: ok, that is the most important thing, most of the nerves are there and at the entrance
ScottyDg842: if you can get good at working that with your tounge and fingers, thats about all she should need
//in all fairness he knows what he's doing, but I'm afraid his man friend named his penis //clitoris and Scott is merely describing a homosexual encounter
Lightningcount48: hmmm interesting what if I did it like I see in the pornos and go real deep like the black guys do I think she might like that
ScottyDg842: NO
ScottyDg842: porno = BAD
//No bad porno=Bad. The stuff I make is legit.
ScottyDg842: porn is made for the viewer
ScottyDg842: not for the pleasure of either actors
Lightningcount48: but there is a great deal of orgasming
ScottyDg842: also, harder <> better
//that means "does not equal" for all you tech illiterate people out there
Lightningcount48: I thought,,,, you know
Lightningcount48: why not
Lightningcount48: I trtied it really hard once and she said stop right away I got her off in like 30 seconds
//If I were really this pathetic I would never ever tell anyone, especially scott
ScottyDg842: kyle, throw everything you saw in porn out, trust me
ScottyDg842: that is why
Lightningcount48: what is why
ScottyDg842: porn is not a good learning source (<
Lightningcount48: but she likes it I;ve seen it on her computer
//I've made up a monster I hate this bitch
ScottyDg842: again, what you see is not true, just take my word for it
ScottyDg842: also, if you want to show her you care, pick up some "her pleasure" condoms
ScottyDg842: I can give you some if you want
//WTF!!!!!!!!!! NO! not only does that mean I have to see you....ewww
Lightningcount48: buncha ungreatful bastards
//I might be leaving after Scott leaves but that besides the point and I love my family
ScottyDg842: thus why I plan on getting stoned over the holidays
Lightningcount48: great
ScottyDg842: I like my family, but not spending copious time with them
Lightningcount48: me either
Lightningcount48: well I gtg lots of cleaning tomorrow
Lightningcount48: ttyl
/And I thought that was the end I almost signed off and then....
ScottyDg842: alright, I'll try and find this one thing alice gave me
Lightningcount48: ?
//My curiosity was piqued. I knew it had to be hilarious
ScottyDg842: it was a guide to women's bodies in general, it'll help
Lightningcount48: mmkay
//::groan::
ScottyDg842: seeya later man
//I hope not I really don't want to smoke weed
Well that was fun I hope you enjoyed that piece of Tomfoolery. It almost didn't happen, but I choked my morals and did it anyway. As always this was done in the spirit of fun and comedy don't hate me too bad.
don't smoke weed kids its bad for you.
But send me money its good for you.
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